The Walking Dead S04E The big hoedown at the end was fun to watch, but it was preposterous, even for a show about walking corpses eating the living.
You know what it is good for? Stories of unfathomable badassery, that's what. Over the years, we at Cracked have gathered a formidable collection of these stories, and we've put the very best of them here so that a whole new generation of readers can feel inadequate about their life choices.
Read on and you'll learn all the military history too pants-burstingly awesome to make it into your history books. Advertisement 94 Commandos in Fake Boobs and Blackface What if you had to disguise some commandos who were going to be walking right past enemy guards?
You'd have to come up with something amazing -- lives are at stake here. Continue Reading Below Advertisement Or, you could come up with something so stupid that the enemy finds it too awkward to make eye contact. Such was the thinking of Israeli special forces commandos who infiltrated Beirut in to kill three leaders of the PLO.
To not arouse suspicion, they took several hulking special forces guys and dressed them up as women, complete with wigs, high heels and fake boobs. They walked right past police, bodyguards, etc. Continue Reading Below Advertisement When they got to the Palestinian leaders' bedrooms, they kicked in the doors, whipped out their guns and killed everyone.
Oh, and lest you think this was a bad career move, one of the "women" was Ehud Barak, who later became Prime Minister of Israel and is currently Defense Minister.
People died because they mistook this man for a woman. In11 Australian commandosall white, disguised themselves as Malay fishermen by dyeing their skin brown and boarding a fishing boat.
They sailed through 2, miles of Japanese-controlled ocean from Australia to Singapore. At one point they even traveled right alongside a Japanese warship without them noticing anything strange which was good, because none of the commandos could speak Malay.
They then took canoes right into Singapore Harbor, where they blew up seven Japanese ships before escaping. So racism is OK as long as you have plenty of bombs and canoes. Continue Reading Below Advertisement But to top them all, Sarah Edmondsa year-old white woman working as a spy for the Union Army, infiltrated Confederate territory in Virginia disguised as a black man.
Somehow, this totally worked, and she snagged the plans to a fort and the identities of some Confederate spies before " escaping " back to Union lines.
Yet neither of her identities were allowed to vote. He found it in two Iraqi troops who were holding up the offensive.
Hughes was ordered to take them out. And not out to dinner, unless they both ordered a lead steak. A tiny one, shaped like a bullet. I'll have to get a manager. The problem was that the wind was blowing tremendously.
See, this is something that doesn't come up in the movies -- when you're trying to shoot from far away with any kind of wind, you have almost no goddamned idea where the bullet will end up.
Sniping isn't just holding the cross hairs steady on the tiny soldier in the scope; it's trying to predict gusts of wind that could push the bullet into some innocent tree trunk 50 feet away.
And yes, that's how much of a difference wind can make. You can not only miss the guy, but miss the whole house he's standing in. So that's what happened to all those road signs in the country! Continue Reading Below Advertisement Oh, and as if his fate were being written by the vengeful spirit of a vaudeville comedian, Hughes discovered that his targets were a little over a half mile away, which, powerful wind notwithstanding, was beyond the range of the rifle he was using.
To make matters worse and yes, there apparently was still room for them to get worsethe enemy soldier he was targeting was covered in a fortified position, with only a small portion of his head and torso exposed. Hughes would have only one chance, because if he took a shot and missed, the Iraqi would simply duck completely behind cover and never come back up.
It'd be like if Luke Skywalker had been commanded to park his X-Wing at the beginning of the trench, and to lean out of the cockpit with a grenade wedged in his ass and try to power-shit it into the Death Star's exhaust port.
Continue Reading Below Advertisement Cackling in the face of insurmountable odds, Hughes did his best to judge, based on the haze from the heathow to aim the rifle to hit his target.
His judgment led him to aim the shot 56 feet to the left and 38 feet highwhich is another way of saying "Hughes pointed his gun in a totally unrelated goddamn direction.
Needless to say, the Iraqi was killed, though we're fairly certain his last words were the equivalent of "Oh, no fucking way. Only the power of bullshit can save you now. Continue Reading Below Advertisement It wasand Napoleon was having trouble conquering the Austrians, who had adopted a strong defensive position on the east bank of the Danube.
The French needed to get across, but the only bridge within marching distance was wired with explosives, and the Austrians had orders to blow it up the second France attacked. Knowing that trying to take the bridge by force would simply result in it getting blown to rubble, Napoleon's officers came up with a plan so stupid, it had to work.
Continue Reading Below Advertisement Two marshals named Lannes and Murat just casually strolled up to the bridge guards and started chatting about how glad they were that an armistice had finally been signed and that the fighting was now over in case you're not following along, this was a blatant lie.Word of the Year.
Our Word of the Year choice serves as a symbol of each year’s most meaningful events and lookup trends. It is an opportunity for us to reflect . Archives and past articles from the Philadelphia Inquirer, Philadelphia Daily News, and initiativeblog.com Our Word of the Year choice serves as a symbol of each year’s most meaningful events and lookup trends.
It is an opportunity for us to reflect on the language and ideas that represented each year. So, take a stroll down memory lane to remember all of our past Word of the Year selections. The. A couple of weeks ago the voters of New York’s 14th Congressional district, in a spasm of petulant unwisdom, elected to the House of Representatives one Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, a garrulous, bug-eyed Jacobin ignoramus not even out of her twenties.
The Walking Dead "Too Far Gone" Review: Just Getting It Done. RESPECTED HISTORIAN RALF GEORG REUTH ARGUES THAT HITLER may have had a ‘real’ reason to hate the Jews. Noted for his breadth of knowledge on World Wars I and II and its prominent figures, German historian Reuth has enjoyed much acclaim for his numerous books covering the World Wars era.